Your worst fears...

[mijan]

So I've been stuck on an odd train of thought lately... phobias.  Why am I mentally stuck on phobias right now?  Well, I've been wrestling with my own lately.  Severely.  Because I'm probably going to have to face up to it again very soon, and I don't know if I can handle it.

What is it that causes a perfectly rational, normally brave, confident person, who doesn't have any normal fears (heights, guns, bombs, snakes, rats, serial killers, clowns under the bed), to turn into a shaking, crying, screaming, frantic panic over some minor thing?  Or is it just me?  I think I surprised a couple of people the other day when I expressed my own phobia.  I guess they thought nothing scared me.  So, I got to wondering, what are other people scared of?

I don't mean normal fears, or things that make you a bit uncomfortable.  You might be a bit scared of heights, and you might not want to jump off the high-dive at the local swimming pool, but you don't collapse into hysterics because you need to climb a three-step ladder, so it's not a debilitating phobia.  See what I mean? Picture Bart Simpson: "Can't sleep. Clowns will eat me. Can't sleep, clowns will kill me." Or something like that.

I've turned off ISP logging.  Feel free to post anonymously if you don't want people to know what personally scares the shit out of you, or if you want the liberating experience of "coming out of the closet" with your phobia, you can post while logged in.  I'd really like to know what scares people, and how they cope with it.  So, let the group-therapy session begin...

~P

Comments

[miss-charmed.livejournal.com]

Blood. I get dizzy everytime i see blood on other people... But my own blood's fine, i'm actually fascinated by it. Weird. :\

[knotty-stuff.livejournal.com]

Earwigs. Hate 'em.

*shudders*

Can cope with spiders 'n' scorpions 'n' snakes, but those li'l bugs with pincers on their rear ends... ick.

[mijan.livejournal.com]

Ick... I'll agree... earwigs are some of the most disgusting insects I've ever encountered. They used to be a problem where my grandparents lived in Nova Scotia, and everyone in the area had to use all sorts of stuff to keep them out of the houses. Gross.

[nymphadora17.livejournal.com]

The thing that I fear most? Loosing one of my best friends (Them being hurt or something happening between us that would destroy our friendship). They're my family and we (there's 8 of us) do everything together. I know it sounds sappy, and like anyone would fear that anyway, but it is truely what terrifies me the most. I guess my boggart would be similar to Mrs. Weasleys, lol. I can handel other things; insects, heights, darkness, horror movies etc. just fine.

Oh and Severus Snape dying scares me too, lol.

Lauren xxx

PS. Have yet to review latest chapter, sorry, I will, things have just been kind of hectic lately. 'twas fantastic though!

[mijan.livejournal.com]

Well, I guess we can't let Snape die then. *grins* And losing loved ones is a very valid fear.

Don't worry about reviews. I'm just glad you enjoyed it.

[(Anonymous)]

Out of curiosity, what's your biggest fear?

[mijan.livejournal.com]

Had to ask that, huh? See, I'm still not completely comfortable with it, and I'm rather embarrassed... which is one of the reasons I set up for anonymous posting... so people who aren't comfortable completely can still talk about it.

[sparklychibi.livejournal.com]

Windows. Dark windows at night when I'm in a lighted house. I can't go past them. I stand there for minutes on end and then ruun past as fast as possible. My room has a huge window seat, so I have to start pulling down the shades at sunset.

It used to be that I was afraid that... well, this sounds super paranoid, but that someone would shoot me through the window. But now I'm just scared that someone will be standing there watching me. And I won't be able to see them.

[mijan.livejournal.com]

I used to have a somewhat milder fear that was similar. That someone would start shooting into my house at night, through the window. I'd play the thought through my head, but it would't cause me to freeze up or anything. But I can definitely understand.

[ackonrad.livejournal.com]

Deep water and drowning. Curiously enough, I'm not afraid that I could drown, but I've always been rather hysterical that someone else could in front of me. I've forbidden my family and friends to lean over the sea whenever we're in a boat or ship, because I can't stand it. I remember pulling my sister back countless times when we were children, because I've always been afraid that she would fall in the water and drown.

[mijan.livejournal.com]

Wow... that's different. Sounds a bit like my grandmother... very tough lady, but when my mother would go fishing with her dad, grandmere would get nervous: "What if you fall in?!?" And my mother, who could swim very well, would say, "I'll get wet!" But my grandmere couldn't stop being very nervous about it.

[zanai.livejournal.com]

Hm... my main phobia is needles. The thing with needle and blood phobias *which i just found out the other day* is that people with them dont have panic attacks when they see them, they faint. Well, at the vet's the other day, they brought in two needles to give to my cat, and just the site of them made me almost collapse. I got really lightheaded and had to face the corner.

Another big fear of mine is the thought of Nothingness. Voids, Not Being after you die, etc, scare the SHIT out of me *shudder* and i freeze up and cant breath and my heart starts beating real erratically. i just cant think about it and remain sane.

Thirdly is oceans and other large things of water. I won't go in above my waist in the ocean, and wont go in where can't touch in pools. I hate water, i have had SO many bad experiences with it that i freak out. I guess though, its really a phobia of drowning, which goes hand in hand with my last fear, of being buried alive. Suffocating in general has to be the worst way to die ever *eep*

and Mijan, i REALLY want to know what your phobia is! it cant be THAT embarrassing.

--Zan

P.S. i read all of eclipse and it ruled supremely!!

[zanai.livejournal.com]

forgot heights too. but not HUGE heights, just the little ones. if its more than about 4 stories up, its not scary anymore, but little things, like ladders and small ledges scare me too.

[(Anonymous)]

Me dying. It doesn't bother me usually unless something happens to me or someone close to me.

Last night, I had told my mother about a lump in my breast and her insistance that I see a doctor ASAP scared me into thinking the worst. I think about those I would leave behind and how gutted they would be, it pains me to uncontrollable tears.

[mijan.livejournal.com]

Well, most people are at least a bit scared of dying, especially when faced with a chance that they could. I think I'm one of the few freakish people who isn't actually scared of death. If you've got a lump in your breast, the best thing to do is to see a doctor and get it removed sooner rather than later. 90% chance or better that it's harmless anyway (just a benign cyst), and even if it's not, if they remove it while it's small, and if you're young and healthy, the chances are very good that it'll never come back. I wish I could do more to assure you, but I wish you luck, and will keep you in my thoughts (and I don't need to know who you are to say a prayer for you).

[jazzyjello.livejournal.com]

Blood. Terrified of blood. Just the sight of just a little blood - even if I know it's not really blood and it's ketchup or something - makes me get all shaky and sick.

I'm scared of getting old. Of ending up all alone.

Bridges. Snakes.

[mijan.livejournal.com]

Don't like snakes? Oh dear. Well, I guess you wouldn't have liked Seymore. And it's amazing how many people are afraid of blood. Let me guess... the vampire costumes with the fake blood are not your favourite for Halloween?

I had a friend who was terrified of bridges. Whenever we drove over one, she had to close her eyes and look straight ahead. I thought she was going to hyperventilate half the time, poor girl.

[http://users.livejournal.com/niemand_/]

My worst fear is monsters. I kid you not. I guess that to sound more reasonable I could say my imagination. See, the thing is, when I'm alone, I get completely paranoid: if the door's half closed, a hyena with green eyes is waiting behind it for me to open the door. If I hear some weird noise, it's a dog with cat's eyes coming to kill me. And what isn't funny is that I believe it. Now that I'm older, I control it more, but I remember once when I was nine that I spent FIVE HOURS sitting on the couch, not moving, TV off and not moving at all, just because there was a funny shadow coming from the hallway. I was scared stiff. When my mother came home, I was so relieved I cried.

[mijan.livejournal.com]

Wow. I used to be mildly afraid of encountering predators in the dark, but I lived out in the woods, and that predators were a reality. You might be afraid of monsters, but you also have a very vivid imagination. So, it's not good, but there's a bright side. *gives hugs and cookies*

[annephoenix.livejournal.com]

This is silly, but... although I'm not scared of dying in a general sense, but I am absolutely *terrified* of dying before the next Potter book is released. I was just discussing it with someone who felt the same way the other day. It's so random and irrational... Yet the mere thought of it actually makes me queasy...

[mijan.livejournal.com]

You know... when I realized that I might be getting deployed to Iraq, I had the same fear. In fact, it WAS terrifying. Silly, but it terrified me.

[firebird157.livejournal.com]

Wasps and Hornets but not, oddly enough, Bees. I'm so damned irrational about Hornets that I collapse in a heap screaming if I see one and sometimes in summer at night I have to turn the radio on so I can get to sleep because I'm convinced I can hear a wasp (or hornet) buzzing round my room.

I used to be the same way about spiders but then a friend introduced me to his pet tarantula and that didn't scare me at all. It seemed a bit silly to be scared of other spiders when I'd had big and venemous crawling up my arm without flinching. (He actually went and got the tarantula from it's home when I told him I was arachnophobic because he said 'Fred' would fix that)

What I'm not afraid of is snakes. I'm wary of venemous snakes but I can't understand why people are scared of non-venemous ones. I'm not afraid of any reptiles really ... when I was 2 years old my parents had to stop me climbing into to the crocodile enclosure at the zoo to pet the crocodiles. Two year olds have no sense of self presevation... I wouldn't try it now (unless the croc had it's jaw taped) but I am known for petting non-venemous snakes when I have the chance. Partly because it freaks people out and partly because I adore snakes.

[mijan.livejournal.com]

Well, bees can bumble along lazily, and won't attack unless attacked. Those big fat bumblebees are rather cute. We used to catch them with jars when they'd land on flowers when we were kids. But wasps and hornets... nasty things. I had a hornet fly up my trousers when I was really little, and they don't lose their stingers, so the damn thing kept stinging over and over. I don't remember (I think I repressed it) but my mom told me. So, I sympathize with that one. They don't scare me, but I definitely don't like them.

It's good that you don't mind snakes. Fascinating critters. :)

[ashice-roses.livejournal.com]

I had this unrational fear from when I was little, that my parents were going to die. I don't know, every time they went out, my imagination would sprout up all the different things that could happen to them, and then what would happen after that. Its still a small fear of mine.

I used to hate spiders as well. I mean, couldn't go into the same room as them, I really hated them. I suppose this is quite a common one. Its faded in the last few years, I'm living in a place where you can't help but have to get a bit used to spiders, we have the biggest huntsman's here, as big as your hand. One lived in my bedroom for a month! I still can't go near them, and I will always get one of my friends or someone to get it out for me if possible! But living in Australia, with all its million of poisonous animals, I'm suprised I can even go outside! Just lets say, I don't really think about it!

-ash

[mijan.livejournal.com]

My best friend was arachnaphobic, so much so that even with the tiniest, nonpoisonous spider, she'd cower in the far corner of the room, begging me to kill it. I believe the exact phrase one time was: "You kill a spider, I love you forever." I laughed and squished this little thing that was barely bigger than the tip of my thumb. I don't know how I'd react to those huge, poisonous ones you have where you live though. We don't actually have ANY poisonous spiders where I live. Very safe part of the world. No poisonous snakes either. Although I did get hospitalized for a spider bite when I was training out west.

[(Anonymous)]

Feet :S

[mijan.livejournal.com]

Stinky, nasty, just-ran-ten-miles feet, or any feet?

[brianne.livejournal.com]

Butterflies

[sgt-majorette.livejournal.com]

We have a couple of butterflyphobes in my extended family, so you're not alone. Can't say you're not weird, because my family most certainly is, but you're not alone.

[klave.livejournal.com]

My biggest fear? That the world really is 'flat, stale and unprofitable'.

[mijan.livejournal.com]

Your fear is a reality. Hate to break it to you. Can I offer some chocolate to help make up for that fact?

Don't know why I'm telling you this...

[(Anonymous)]

Going out. Being around other people in general, I hate being in crowds... I hate people seeing me... I know I look terrible so I'm basically sparing them from looking at something hideous anyway by not going out. This is actually pretty much the main reason I dropped out of school, I was bullied about my looks so now I'm too scared to go, how stupid is that? I hyperventilate just thinking about going back there... I also know how stupid I am so I'm really scared of failing, another reason why I'm too scared to go, I know I'm not smart enough. I'd fail, my parents would be so disappointed in me... but they already are I guess... I am a failure, so one of my fears is already a reality, I have fucked up my life beyond recognition and dying doesn't scare me now because I want to die.

Don't worry, I know how pathetic I am, I doubt your fear is much more embarrassing then mine.
Sorry for telling you all this.

Re: Don't know why I'm telling you this...

[mijan.livejournal.com]

Why would you be sorry for telling me? I've seen people go through that... my mother was assigned to tutor a girl who was terrified of going to school, being around people, being in crowds. She thought everyone hated her, that she was ugly, and that she was stupid. When my mom first went to her house to teach, she shouldn't even open the door to her room and come out. It took her a long time to make progress, but eventually, she was willing to let me come over as well and tutor her in biology, which was my specialty. You know what? She was cute as a button, and actually very very smart when she wasn't afraid. She thought she was a failure and could never fix her life... but she did. I believe she's graduated high school by now.

Believe me, you're not pathetic, nor should you ever let yourself believe that. I wish I could offer you more than that, but I'm here, not there, and I can't. I can't claim to personally know what it feels like, but I do know that the whole world is full of people who are afraid of failure, and think that they're pathetic, when in reality, we're all only human. But like I said, I do want you to know that I've know a few people in your shoes, who have felt the exact same things you're describing, who pulled away from everything and hid. It happens more often than you might think, so you're NOT alone. It can get better, with small steps at a time. Coming out and saying this here, even anonymously, is a step. If you want, you can keep posting anonymously, and we can talk. I'll listen.

Phobias

[sgt-majorette.livejournal.com]

I don't consider my fear of drowning to be phobic, even though I made unprecedented scenes during "drownproofing" in the military: I'm pretty sure I drowned in a previous life. And I don't care to leave my apartment, but medication controls that little issue. Plus I'm retired, so I don't have to go out.

No, the phobia that I can't figure out how to deal with ("...think of the thing that scares you most, and imagine how you might force it to look comical...") is sunflowers.

Daisies and black-eyed susans, I can purse my lips and curl my toes and deal with, but I have dropped out of PT formations in Germany and crossed streets all over the world to avoid giant sunflowers. I once rode a train through fields and fields of them in Bulgaria; thirty years later I still get the shakes when I think about it.

Re: Phobias

[mijan.livejournal.com]

Wow... that definitely is a different one. Interesting. I wonder what caused that one.

[curia-regis.livejournal.com]

I'm terrified of flowers. I will actually cross the road if I can when passing florists. I swear, they look like they will eat me. And my parents wonder why the hell I was so scared when they told me to mow the lawn. We used to have a huge (size of my hand) tulip-like flower that was deep purple and it was absolutely fucking terrifying for me.

I also don't particularily like crowds much but it's not a massive fear. It's more of me feeling uncomfortable and trying to back away and disappear.

Phones. Talking on phones. I take so long to call anybody because just picking up the phone, dialling the number and saying: "Hi, can I speak to ___" really scares me.

I have weird phobias. I've heard of others being scared of phones and crowds, but not flowers.

[mijan.livejournal.com]

Actually, if you look back through the posts... I believe it was SGT Majorette who said she was terrified of Sunflowers. Seriously.

I hate calling people I don't know well, but I'm not actually scared of it. A lot of people don't like phones, and I know plenty of people who don't like crowds. So, you're not that odd! And I like slightly odd people anyway! *hugs*

Now, turn on your Y!M. *grins*

[doompaw.livejournal.com]

This isn't particularlry a phobia but sometimes I get really scared of my own subconscious. Sometimes I have these brief flashes of images when I'm doing something that isn't dangerous at all, showing me ways that I could get injured, and ways that I could die. Like I was walking past the refrigerator the other day and there was a knife on the counter that my mom was using to cut vegetables and I thought that it woyld swing out and cut me in half. The another time I was getting into the car like I do every day and I got the fleeting image of the door slamming on my neck, or on my leg. >_>

Yes, I think I have a mild case of OCD. :/

[mijan.livejournal.com]

*pets* *gives chocolate* Chocolate is always safe. :)

[ice-is-blue.livejournal.com]

My main public phobia is of squishing. Grapes, snails, spiders... the flattening of organic material into a pancake shape (imagined or actual) will make me squeal, duck, and hide. Some of my friends think my reaction is for show... and I might be tempted to agree, except I've tried -not- to react... and can't. Squishing really does give me the willies. (Naturally, I am a supporter of capture and release when it comes to creepy-crawlies and critters in the house.)

That said... I think I have a deeper phobia of failure. Not so much that I won't turn out okay, but that I'll let others down. Or a fear that my actions (or lack/deficiency thereof), will in some way negatively affect others. A popular manifestation for this phobia (which I display) is procrastination. And hand-in-hand with fear of failure is fear of success... that once having done something well, I fear the expectation to surpass my previous achievements. Let me tell ya... living in your own shadow is the pits. I have high self-esteem and I know what I'm capable of, so I tend to hold myself to a higher standard than those around me. It's an interesting double-edged sword.

And I also (I'm just realizing) very uncomfortable in flat, open spaces... emphasis on flat. If there are no hills or natural texture to the land, it gives me the creeps. As such, as I age, I'm begining to dislike beaches and the ocean. Not for the water, but for the flat, featurelessness of it.

[sgt-majorette.livejournal.com]

Apparently there's a type of pervert who gets off on film clips of teen girls squishing bugs with their bare feet. No lie, this was the premise of one of those prime-time cop-and-lawyer shows a couple of years ago.

Fear of flat, open spaces is agoraphobia; three guesses how I know that, and the first two don't count... Do you ever wonder what the first man (oh, yes, it was a man. I'd put money on that!) was thinking who got on a floating log and ventured out into open water?

[(Anonymous)]

Thank you, I'll see what I can find out :)

[mijan.livejournal.com]

*is glad*

[etoile-du-tir.livejournal.com]

I don't know if you can call this a phobia, but my entire life I've always been paranoid that people are always plotting against me/plotting ways to make my life miserable or embarass me or humiliate me/talking about me. I would walk down the hall in high school and see people talking, and I just knew they were talking about me, even when I didn't even know the people. I was sure they were making fun of me. Even now, it's hard for me to make friends because I'm sure they don't really like me, they just tolerate me. I swear, I make up these scenarios when all my friends are getting together and I'm invited where they all got together and say we're all gonna do something, but then it's gonna end up I'm the only one there or something.
And it's hard for me to IM/call people because I feel like they don't like me, don't want to talk to me. That's why I often wait for people to IM me, and if they don't I feel like they don't want to talk to me, don't like me, etc.

yeah...so that's mine. Does it count as a phobia?

[mijan.livejournal.com]

In a way, it does. A lot of people feel like that to some degree or another... and some of it is based in face. There really ARE a lot of nasty people in the world who have nothing better to do that be nasty. But there are also a lot of really nice people who really do like you. Like me! And you can IM me whenever you want. In fact, getting randomly IM'd with a smiley face can absolutely make my day. *hugs*

[sparks-of-blue.livejournal.com]

Ack...I have this thing about scales. Like scales on a fish, on snakes ect. Especially so when fish bloat up when they are sick and their scales raise up away from their bodies....*shudders* I find that absolutely disgusting
Oh and the thought that you can lift them up and mites can grow under them. And I also am disgusted by the thought of growing scales - mainly on the underside of my wrists...ERGH!
Well...I won't go into fainting fits or anything like that if I see scales, but ergh it gives me the creeps thinking about it and makes me want to scratch myself.
Hmm...sounds kinda strange huh?

[mijan.livejournal.com]

It's odd, but in my book, there's no such thing as an invalid phobia or creep-out trigger. They are what they are. It's an interesting one though. I'll take it that you've never cleaned and scaled a fish.

[(Anonymous)]

Interesting phobias listed here. I guess that mine would seem rather simple but I do know why I have it. I am terrified of dark closed in places.
This is not just fear. I can not breath I can not function. Absolute terror so deep that I can not even think about ever being buried after I die (or anyone else). Can not enter a dark room, etc.
Why? Thanks to an idiot I knew in high school. He "harassed" me in the school's dark room. Made my skin crawl knowing someone was there but not being able to feel them until they actually reached out and touched you. By that time it is to late. Creepy!

[mijan.livejournal.com]

Eek, very creepy! I can see how that would leave a lasting impression, and not a good one.