mijan | Fic: "An Apple a Day"

Title: "An Apple a Day"
Author:

mijan
Rating: PG for one cuss word.
Characters: Chris Pine, Zachary Quinto, Karl Urban, JJ. Abrams
Summary: Chris finds a source of amusement during the filming of the Kobayashi Maru scene.

Notes: Yes, I wrote a story about the actors. I'm a horrible person. I was sitting here at lunch, eating my own apple, looked at the little produce sticker on the apple, and... goddamned plot bunny. Couldn't resist. It's short, it's funny, it's innocent. But still... where am I going, and why am I in this handbasket?

Chris tossed the apple in his hands back and forth, waiting for the camera crew to reset for the next take. Six down, seventeen thousand to go. One of the scenes he’d been looking forward to shooting the most, and he felt like shit. The day had started too early, and nobody was quite on their game that day. Not enough sleep, not enough coffee, and the blue cadet uniforms made the red ones look like a high fashion statement.

Over at his station, Karl seemed to be the only person in a decent mood today, as he chatted amiably with the woman checking his makeup.

Okay, so maybe SOME people can make even these uniforms look good, he thought to himself.

Taking a deep breath, he pointedly focused on mentally playing over the script in his head as he stared back at his apple. A new one for every take. He loved apples, but he was gonna hate Fijis by the time this was over. He glared at the little sticker on the apple that had been accidentally left there. Not the end of the world, of course, but he could just picture it – a few months from now, when they’d be editing the final cut, some hawk-eyed film jockey would see a tiny little sticker on the apple and insist that the whole scene be filmed again, despite the fact that a digital touch-up could fix it.

He sighed. Not worth the hassle of worrying about it.

He pinched the edge of the sticker, pulled it off, and stared at it on his fingertip.

Fiji apples. From… oh boy.

He glanced back up at Karl and grinned wickedly. Smug, sardonic amusement is my motivation, huh? I think I’ve found my motivation.

Surreptitiously, he tucked the sticker into the palm of his hand.

Fifteen minutes later…

“… and the successful rescue of the Kobayashi Maru crew… is underway.” He clapped Karl on the back, turned, bit into his apple again, and looked up at the observation deck windows, grinning smugly.

A few seconds later, he heard the beautiful sound: “Cut!”

J.J. scurried onto the set, grinning. “I don’t know what did it for you, but you nailed the emotion this time. It looked like you were actually smirking the whole time. I think we’ve got it.”

Chris just grinned, trying not to let himself continue looking smug. It would have been far too easy.

J.J. clapped his hands together. “Okay everybody, break for lunch.”

As the cast and crew scattered, Zach came around from the other side of the set, his amusement looking misplaced with the Vulcan ears. He walked up to Chris and nudged him with his shoulder. “What does the sticker say?”

Chris glanced up subtly at Karl, who was gathering his wallet and keys from a table. The tiny purple and white sticker was still standing out blatantly on Karl’s shoulder.

“Product of New Zealand,” Chris whispered.

Zach coughed to disguise his laugh. “You gonna tell him?”

“Nah. Let’s see how long he leaves it there.”

Zach snickered, which looked really misplaced on a Vulcan. “Lunch?”

Chris frowned. “Actually… I’m not hungry. Wonder why,” he said, not pleased that he’d wasted his appetite. However, as he walked off of the set, taking one last glance at the little produce sticker, he had decided that maybe he liked Fiji apples just fine.

That was, until something hard and heavy whacked him in the back of the shoulder and fell with a thud. He looked down and saw a Fiji apple rolling on the ground, and looked up to see Karl standing there, tossing another apple lightly in his hand.

“I’m glad it worked for you, Chris, but you know I’m going to have to get you back for that.”

Three weeks later, as Karl whacked him progressively harder with the damned hypospray in each take, Chris decided that he hated Fiji apples.